|Description||Original upload: 2012-09-11 | |
Since Los Angeles is the only city without a CBS "C.S.I." franchise (I do recall "C.S.I: Punxatawney," right?), leave it to porn to supply one. Director John Bruno dives into the silliness of the premise, having his actors go through a situation every bit as loopy as one that you'd find in one of the series with straight faces. However, the body parts are anything but straight as the sex rises above the fun to be had to present one damn sexy video, headlined by the superb duo of Maxx Diesel and the omnipotent Arpad Miklos.
Arpad is found naked on a sidewalk (and that wouldn't attract a crowd of gawkers?) and the Cock Scene Investigators are called in. The leader is Maxx Diesel, a former cop who was kicked off the force by a nasty homophobic commissioner who now solves "gay-related sex crimes." There aren't too many clues for Maxx, all bulging muscles and shiny pate. A condom stuck in Arpad's ass, dildo and lube nearby. After Maxx dusts Arpad's ass for fingerprints, he turns him over to reveal that he's ... gasp ... the commissioner! "Ain't karma a bitch!" Maxx revels. Maxx deduces that Arpad had gone to a sex club and had been slipped something by Parker Williams.
Off to the sex club go C.S.I. team members Dan Rider, a graying hot hairy muscle daddy, and the more boyish but also hairy Maxx Summer (and not asking for a pay raise while doing it like some of the mainstream "C.S.I" people). As they look for clues, the apparently clueless Maxx asks what the shackles are for, so Dan ties him in. "Partner, I've been wantin' to sex you up for a long time!" Dan admits before kissing Maxx. Dan works down the chest and then his blowjob keeps Maxx nice and hard as Maxx wriggles both a face-fuck and a lovely cock tease at Dan's ready face. Untied, Maxx blows big-dicked Dan, whom he is able to deep-throat wonderfully. Dan seems delighted when Maxx's ass is pointing him in the face, so he gives it a regal rimjob, licking all over the hairy hole and truly enjoying himself doing it. Dan pokes at it with some fingers, putting Maxx on his head so he can watch. Maxx, at the command of "eat your daddy's hole," does just that, slobbering all over his partner with the same focus. Maxx sinks some digits into Dan, but it's Maxx who finds himself in the sling getting loudly fucked by a fierce Dan as the sling keeps the movement all liquid and fun. Dan really works the junior investigator with utmost glee and then Maxx rides on Dan, shooting himself high in the air to skewer himself fully. Dan goes back to active fucking to get Maxx to cum and then Dan drops a load all over Maxx's face and tongue.
At the crime lab (which isn't so amazingly posh as the gleaming super-expensive sets that are unbelievably shown on TV), gorgeous uber-muscle stud Robert Van Damme tells boss Maxx Diesel that the dildo is just a typical double-headed dildo, but pert blond Joey Russo finds the lube to be a special brand and the condom had no semen in it. Apparently, Arpad was never actually fucked. Swarthy goateed Jeff Brooks analyzes Arpad's dick, finding it blown because it's chafed. When Maxx leaves, Joey admits to being turned on by the crime pictures, so they decide to "recreate the crime scene." Everyone strips from his black T-shirt and jeans so that Joey can chomp down on the wowing uncut cock Robert sports. Joey gobbles himself into gagging, but never stops, eventually mastering a tricky deep-throat. Jeff gets to blow as well, and there is much fun to be had watching them work the piece together, but it's Joey, lavishing as much spit on the cock as Robert drips down to it, who steals the scene. At one point, he continues sucking as Jeff eats Robert's ass. Not to be left out of the fun, Robert places the others side by side so he can eat their asses, clearly enjoying Joey's to the limit. Robert fucks Jeff solidly, hammering at him with good speed as Joey fingers the topman. The phone dares to ring, but Jeff, still being fucked, chides that they are too busy and goes back to enjoying Robert's elegant work. Joey roars back into active duty fucking Jeff, with Robert in him! Joey goes back and forth, holding tight onto Jeff as he maneuvers himself between the guys. Joey then gives Jeff a particularly good solo fuck, kissing Robert for inspiration. Jeff cums first, followed by a gargantuan blast from Joey that cements him as the hero of this scene and then, sitting on Jeff's finger, Robert finishes last.
Maxx tracks Arpad down to a motel and Maxx demands to know the truth. "Tell me what really happened and I might be able to salvage your life," he tells the one of the only porn stars to thankfully appear on more TV sets than actual "C.S.I" episodes (well, it's a close run-off, if not). We watch the scene unfold with Arpad and Parker in the dungeon. Arpad, looking his radiant hairy best, finds a willing partner in Parker and they are off to a grinding sweaty start just as they kiss. Filled with lust, Arpad rims Parker, doing his superb best as Parker winces in pleasure from the major tongue bath his hole gets. Arpad attacks it with big tongue and doesn't let up. The strapping stud then ends up on his knees blowing Parker. Anyone who can't stay hard looking down at that man sucking his cock just doesn't deserve him, and Parker enjoys it totally! Parker and his ever-ready mouth attack Arpad in the same vein, finding room somehow in his mouth for all of Arpad's cock. That's no easy task, but a gagging Parker manages to take the thick piece with sheer will. This scene, filmed with absolute ingenious love by the cameraman, finds an easy highlight when Arpad sits on Parker's face to take a very intent tongue up his ass. He bends over to make it a 69 as Parker attempts to stick a finger in Arpad's ass. Before we'll ever see that, Arpad fucks Parker, planting his thick legs hard on the floor and slamming away at Parker. His sizzling style is fully intact and they soon move to a sling where Arpad can go even faster and harder. Sadly, it's over quickly before Parker cums. Arpad growls his way into a stellar shot and then collapses. "Night, night, motherfucker," spits Parker.
Well, Maxx can't cover up the crime just to save the commissioner's reputation, can he? "What if I make it worth your while?" Arpad slyly asks, which finds them tongue to tongue in nanoseconds (imagine resisting either of these men). Muscular Maxx takes to Arpad's hairy nipples and great abs as teasers leading to the towering dick. Maxx sucks it, adding a touch of sensual wanting to oral work that so far in the video has been plain old zealous. With Maxx's stomach heaving, Arpad returns the favor, encountering this hefty cock with even more eagerness than he displayed in the previous scene. Few men can manage to be imposing sharing a scene with Arpad Miklos, but watch Arpad sitting at Maxx's feet blowing him and it's obvious that they have cast him a great partner. Maxx sits Arpad in a chair and blows him again, working in a more voracious mood now. He tosses the legs in the air and eats his ass but good! His shining tongue meets Arpad's twitching ass with the camera there to see it all. Arpad then has another field day in Maxx's shaved asshole, burying his chin in there deep and slapping Maxx's cheeks happily. Here's a mystery for you: which of these manly grunting studs will give it up for the other? Wondering over when Arpad goes plowing his entire cock smoothly into Maxx. Arpad rocks the bed with all of his energy and Maxx admirably takes it all. Even sideways Arpad is unstoppable. It's a hard position, but he makes it look so damn easy, and Maxx remains beautifully hard. Arpad then takes Maxx with the bottom's ass high in the air and then finishes him off with a slick doggy-fuck. Arpad lets loose a giant spray all over Maxx's head and back after Maxx has finished with Arpad in him. "You're a great fuck, commissioner, but I just can't break the law. You can't live in a glass closet and throw stones," Maxx wisely notes.
There's a surprise ending I didn't see coming at all, and it fits just perfectly with the spoof. After all, "C.S.I" episodes almost always feature some ridiculous twist that makes it impossible to play along at home. However, the porn "C.S.I" doesn't want to be so remote. In fact, it begs the viewer to be a part of it, using such gloriously wonderful studs to play the parts. The sex never suffers at the hands of the story and one can see sequels galore for the very able Maxx Diesel. Personally, I hope commissioner Arpad Miklos is allowed back because he's the real stunner of this piece.
DVD features: Chapters; trailers ("Hard Cops," "Hard Mechanics" and "Truckers"); interviews (Robert Van Damme, Parker Williams, Arpad Miklos and Maxx Summer); behind-the-scenes footage; and no regional coding (playable worldwide).
A DVD Review by Brent Blue ( hxxp://www.ManNet.com )
Starring Maxx Diesel, Arpad Miklos (a.k.a. Francois Kagylo), Robert Van Damme, Jeff Brooks, Joey Russo, Dan Rider, Maxx Summer and Parker Williams.
Directed by John Bruno.
A Massive Studio DVD.
|Size||689.06 MB (722,527,744 bytes)|
|Num files||1 files|